Makeup Journey of a soon-to-be MUA

If you've been following my content from the very beginning
you would've probably heard me mentioning wanting to study
to become a professional MUA (Make Up Artist). It wasn't a crazy
spur-of-the-moment decision, or anything like that. I've been 
looking into doing this for about three years, and I still have the
same passion I did in the beginning. 

In one of my very first videos, I briefly discuss my early experiences
with makeup. Growing up in an abusive home environment, and not
knowing how truly wrong it was. It isn't easy for me to discuss,
but I want to help someone who may be going through what I did.
To have it make such an impact on you and your aspirations so much
so that you give up on it. 

Whenever I would experiment with makeup; My then step-father
would get so mad he demanded I remove my any makeup and say
I looked like a 'whore'. My mother would sit there stone-faced next
to him, even when it made me cry. This happened from age thirteen 
on-wards to the point that I never wore makeup in front of him.

I wasn't wearing any crazy colours, and I didn't cake anything
on. I had on pink lipstick, and some shimmery silver eye shadow.
I didn't know how to do makeup yet, and my mother never tried
to teach me. She had mountains of beauty products, but was pretty
basic when it came to applying makeup. She has expensive taste,
and would get angry if I touched her products. I don't think I'll
ever truly understand her, or their combined treatment of me.

So, I stopped wearing makeup, for years until the end of year 12
 (Senior year). Even then I only wore tinted lip balm, and liquid
eyeliner (if I had time to do so in the morning). This was ages ago,
 literally right before Youtube was around. So I couldn't find makeup
tutorials, or how-to-style videos. These girls are doing so many women
of all ages a service, and I am forever grateful to the many I follow. 
This is where I want to take the next step. It no longer makes me 
sad/upset when I think of makeup. Not only have I come so far in my 
makeup skills, but I am also confident I can do this with flying colours. 


If you are going through anything like this, and need someone to
talk to feel free to email me. You're not alone.

Why I Stopped Crossfit

It's been a few months since I have written about my first week of Crossfit.
For many of you the name Crossfit conjures up images of super shredded
men and women doing insane physical tasks in the gym. There are also 
heaps of fail videos all over Youtube depicting people getting seriously
hurt attempting these tasks. That is why I am writing about why I stopped
my Crossfit journey to switch to weight training and boxing. 

At first when I joined this Gym that specialises in Crossfit I knew it would
be difficult, and challenging. I completely trusted that my trainer/coach knew
what he was talking about and instructing us to do. Even though I spoke with
him about me being a beginner and recovering from an ankle injury, he didn't
seem to listen. When I asked about how to do certain things that I knew I 
wasn't doing in the correct form, he would just say 'You'll get there eventually".

I knew if I continued doing some of these exercises without proper direction,
that I would indeed become injured. So I listened to him and tried my best
to keep up without hurting myself. He times our ability to complete our circuit 
training doing various exercises as quickly as we can. So this is the perfect
recipe for injury, and my husband at one point was a personal trainer so I 
am aware of what 'not-to-do'.  

So here is my breaking point

During my timed workout session I would go from Power-cleans, to Burpees,
to Skip rope, Squats, and Hand Stand Push-ups. At the time, I didn't have 
the upper body strength to do a hand stand much less push-ups while 
doing them. I pushed through, and got through most of the work out. 
When I got to my third set of Hand stand push-ups something popped in my 
elbow, and I lost balance and fell on my right arm. My arm was immediately
sore after that. My coach didn't seem to notice, and his mentality about training
really rubbed me the wrong way.

Hand Stand Push-ups (img crd: www.crossfitinvictus.com)

I didn't have a good vibe from this gym and it didn't seem to be anywhere
near the environment I had been looking for. I felt like my coach was almost
mocking in his comments, and felt awkward being around him. So every time
I went to go back I would break into a nervous sweat on the way there. It didn't
help that the coach had taken my number off of my forms that I had submitted,
to send me messages about training. At the end of the day that just creeped
me out.


I am now training at home or at the gym doing various weightlifting,
resistance training, boxing, and jogging. I feel much stronger and happier 
with what I am focused on right now. My husband has helped by showing
me proper forms and movements for exercise routine he has put together. 
This post is dedicated to him for helping me find fitness to be almost
fun again. 

How to Deal with Stress

Sometimes I ask myself how I handle such high stress situations.  

It took me a while to realize how much of a difference your own 

reaction to these situations can affect the overall outcome. For me,

I use my creativity as an outlet of sorts, by writing and making jewelry.

When I look take a step back and look at the 'bigger picture', it makes 

me want to take any negative thoughts or feelings and put it into

something that will be positive for me in the long-run. 

I see many bloggers/vloggers who have issues coping with depression,

anxiety, and stress in their daily lives. Unfortunately, life has it's ups-and-downs.

The most important thing we can do is control how we react and respond.

Freaking out about something you can not change will not affect the outcome. 

I find accepting whatever has happened in my life, and finding a positive direction
really makes a difference.


If I get to the point where I find myself dwelling on something to the point where
it affects my state of mind daily; I will write about it or push myself harder during
a workout. I hope that this helps even just one person, that would be amazing.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask.